Helping A Shy Dog
Source from: blog.oregonlive.com
by Deb Wood
Sprite isn’t a quaking, cowering dog.
But she is shy.
When I picked her out, both her breeder and I thought she was an extrovert. And she is — when she’s someplace she knows well with dogs and people she likes. So, she was pushy among her litter mates and pushy here at my house.
All that changes when we walk out the door. She’s barky at other dogs because she doesn’t trust them. She pulls back from strangers’ hands because she assumes they might be trouble. (This from a dog who hasn’t had a bad day in her life.)
Interestingly, this brings me full circle. My dog Goldie, who passed away last year at the old age of 16, was a terrified, frightened, very shy dog when she came to me when she was 2 years old. Back then — pretty much a lifetime ago in the world of dog training — no one I could find knew what to do to help her. Over time, I learned, and found people who knew things I didn’t know.
All of my writing started with a book called “Help for Your Shy Dog” — which I wrote to help people who were in my situation. It’s still a big seller almost 10 years after it was published.
The lessons I learned from terrified Goldie (who was a happy if quirky dog by the end of her long life) I’m applying to Sprite.
Those lessons include:
Train your dog. The more a shy dog has a sense of normalcy, the calmer she is. Training helps immensely.
Be a leader — in a kind and gentle way. Sprite has to work for her treats (with a “sit” or other obedience command). She gets fed meals rather than free-feeding. The more she sees me as a gentle, kind, predictable leader, the more confident she will feel. The operative words are “gentle” and “kind.” No yelling, rolling the poor dog on her back, or threats. Just give her positive, happy, joyful leadership.
Expose your dog to the world. Shy dogs, like shy people, gain confidence from facing their fears and excelling in a situation. One of those activities for Sprite is the play group I talked about in Wednesday’s blog. She meets new dogs and makes friends, and that builds her confidence.
Don’t Over-do the exposure. Meeting other small, friendly dogs for a limited period of time is good for Sprite. If she were dealing with dogs that might hurt her, or doing the activity for so long that she became overwhelmed, it would make her worse.
I compare these situations to a shy child who’s asked to recite a poem in class. If she recites the poem in her friendly classroom and they cheer — she’s built confidence. If she tries to recite the poem and forgets her lines in front of a booing auditorium full of people — she’ll come out worse for the experience.
Shy dogs need to have their envelope stretched, but just a little bit at a time. They need to succeed each step along the way, just like that little girl reciting the poem.
Believe that your dog will get more confident. What I do know is that Sprite will always be a little bit wary and somewhat leery of new situations. I also know that, with training, continued careful exposure and socialization, and tons of time together, she will learn to be comfortable in places that now scare her.
In fact, in the last month I’ve had a couple of knowledgeable dog trainers remark on what a confident little dog my Sprite is. I knew that was behavior she’d learned, and it made me proud of the work my girl and I have done together.


